That is my general response to most things these days. To say things are overwhelming is quite the understatement, even for someone with my background. With the therapy piece in place, everything else fell apart. I’ve been trying to update this blog, but my cognitive abilities are being thwarted a bit by rogue medication dosages. [...]
Posts Tagged ‘bipolar disorder’
Huh?
Posted in Mental Health, Therapy, tagged bipolar disorder, healthcare, Lamictal, Mental Health, Therapy on 7 February 2012 | 1 Comment »
Now what?
Posted in Abuse, Depersonalisation Disorder, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mental Health, Therapy, tagged Abuse, bipolar disorder, depersonalisation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mental Health, Therapy on 29 September 2011 | 1 Comment »
That was my question for the shrink this morning. I thought she was adding to my list, but she is changing the diagnosis from bipolar I to depersonalisation disorder. My reaction to this is confusion. It’s good that she is acknowledging the trauma and the dissociation, but acknowledging the trauma reinforces the fact that it [...]
Latest Diagnosis
Posted in Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mental Health, Therapy, tagged bipolar disorder, depersonalisation disorder, DID, Mental Health, Therapy, trauma on 27 September 2011 | Leave a Comment »
I saw my new therapist for the second time yesterday. This is good, as the past weekend was a bit difficult. She wasn’t particularly helpful, but I was at least able to hint at what happened, and she was able to figure it out. She stared at me for a bit, silently, and then told [...]
Bipolar Disorder Sucks
Posted in Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mental Health, tagged atypical antipsychotics, best friend, bipolar disorder, Dissociative Identity Disorder, frustration, Mental Health, psychiatrist, side effects, stress, Zyprexa on 12 September 2011 | Leave a Comment »
to use an American phrase that sometimes says it perfectly. I’m having trouble. Today, I’m hypo-manic but rapid cycling all the same. I can’t slow down my thoughts, which are racing from intense anger to deep sadness. My hands are literally shaking from the energy, and I can’t deal with even the slightest of changes [...]
Odd Reactions
Posted in Abuse, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mental Health, Ritual Abuse, tagged Abuse, bipolar disorder, depression, Dissociative Identity Disorder, mania, Mental Health, satanic ritual abuse, suicide, Therapy on 9 June 2011 | 2 Comments »
Not too long ago, I made a decision to end my life. It was several months in the making, as it were. I wrote a note to my best friend, gave him a ring that I wanted him to have as a memory, went home, and took a month’s worth of psych meds. It wasn’t [...]
Not Surprised
Posted in Dissociative Identity Disorder, General Ranting, Mental Health, tagged atypical antipsychotics, bipolar disorder, depression, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Lamictal, rant, Zyprexa on 9 May 2011 | 3 Comments »
I missed most of my shift yesterday. I was so tired and overwhelmed that work seemed relatively impossible. Today, my brain is still too overwhelmed to make sense of essays and articles. I just want to sleep for hours and hours. When I do sleep, though, it isn’t restful and I wake up as exhausted [...]
Swings and Roundabouts
Posted in General Ranting, Health, Mental Health, Therapy, tagged bipolar disorder, frustration, Mental Health, stress, Therapy on 14 February 2011 | 5 Comments »
It’s an English phrase meaning each advantage of a situation comes with a disadvantage. To me, it’s feeling like a very appropriate description of bipolar disorder. My moods are swinging in pendulum fashion, and my thoughts are going round and round in incoherent flashes. I’ve missed work, which leads to financial issues, and my ability [...]
Pining for the Single Life
Posted in Dissociative Identity Disorder, General Ranting, Mental Health, Uncategorized, tagged alters, bipolar disorder, depression, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Lamictal, mania, Mental Health, rant, Seroquel, stress, teen alters on 10 November 2010 | Leave a Comment »
And by that, I mean life before I knew about the others in my head. It was simpler then. [Sad movie theme interrupted by sarcastic chuckle.] Things are a bit interesting here at the moment. Not bad interesting. Just different and a bit overwhelming. Although there have been more than a few upsets in my [...]
Madness
Posted in Dissociative Identity Disorder, Health, Mental Health, tagged Abilify, bipolar disorder, depression, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Geodon, Lamictal, mania, Mental Health, mixed episodes, psychiatrist, rant, school, Seroquel on 31 October 2010 | Leave a Comment »
Let’s take DID out of the picture for a minute. Now, let’s take out SRA. (I know, I know). At this time, bipolar disorder is what’s getting at me. I have never *felt* bipolar, really, until this semester. Now, it’s making itself the centre of my life. It is disrupting my sleep, wrecking my concentration, [...]
All Mixed Up
Posted in Health, Mental Health, Therapy, tagged best friend, bipolar disorder, depakote, Lamictal, mania, mental illness, mixed episodes, psychosis on 24 February 2010 | 2 Comments »
I was diagnosed with bipolar I disorder in late 2005. At the time, I was out of my tiny little mind. I was convinced that the groundskeeper at my best friend’s apartment building was working in cahoots with a four year old boy to lock me into a storage building and kill me. All these [...]
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