The Baby Steps Week So Far

There’s a progressive pattern that most children follow– they learn to crawl, then pull up, then stand on their own, and then take their first wobbly steps.  Why shouldn’t those of us with internal children take those same steps in healing?  I get frustrated and try to push things along at a higher rate of speed than I’m ready for at the moment.  Regardless of the issue I’m dealing with, and regardless of its genesis, I want to have it already worked through.  Now.  That isn’t too much to ask, is it?  🙂

In fact, everything seems to go in baby steps.  I’ve slowly made progress through my school programme and slowly made progress towards working out my financial issues.  Sometimes the speed at which things developed made me panic.  I began to worry that by the time I worked through some of the larger issues, my chance at actual life would be over.  Those thoughts only served to make me feel resigned, beaten before I’d started.  It’s only been through fighting my self(ves) constantly that I’ve started pushing past that.  Sometimes it’s really quite funny– a few days ago, when the panic started, I said aloud ‘How is this helping me?’.

Departing from my own issues and entering the larger world, I just read that Swindon is scraping some of the fixed-point speed cameras.  I’m not certain yet if that’s progress or simply a change the area, and the country at large, isn’t quite prepared for yet.  In any event, I wish them success and safety.

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2 thoughts on “The Baby Steps Week So Far

  1. Thank goodness for those baby steps, they’ll get you where you need to go eventually, even if it’s a slow process.

    Speaking of baby steps, I just moved into my own first place ever, and I just turned 55! I feel shame at times that it took me so long to get here, but then again I simply wasn’t ready or capable of living alone any sooner. The time must be right, for I’m loving it (after worrying that it would drive me to suicide to have so much solitude.)

    I know what you mean about trying to push your inner children too fast. It’s frustrating to have to take things slow. Often I forget I even have others living inside of me, I’m sorry to say.

    englishrain wrote: Congratulations on the new place!! Nothing at all to be ashamed of there. In fact, there’s quite alot of wisdom in waiting until you’re ready and knowing when that time came about. Hope it’s everything you wished it would be.

  2. Yes, I’m a pusher too…push myself(s) much to fast to places most of us dont’ want to visit (again) …ya think? I wonder if I stop pushing and shoving myself and just take a few baby steps if that would be more helpful in the long run as opposed to the harshness of a flashback hell hole where I seem to run (in)to.

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